When we are placed in situations in life, and find ourselves second guessing why we are in this situation or what choices that we made bought us here.. I sit and wonder, is this apart of a plan, to teach me tolerance, to let me gain understanding, or to show me that there will be struggles in life, that there will be people that are unable to appreciate what has been handed to them.
I sit and wonder, why have I been chosen to be this persons confidant, is it because I placed myself in this situation or no matter what moves I made, this would have been the outcome.. to be someones everything, someones weakness and someones desire.. to take on the role of someones confidant, someones other half is a role I wish I was bad at, yes being someones desire and weakness is a gift, but it's also a constant battle – to try so hard, or not try at all.. there will be conflicts no matter what, no matter what move I choose to take, to stay quiet or speak my voice, I am being held down by the words in which he speaks, the words in which he makes me feel guilty, or feel that I am his world, I am his everything, how could I leave, how can I abandon a person in need, a person who needs me, I try to teach and show him the real world, the way life is.. to be independent, to be your own person, don't be defined by another, don't make someone your everything when in an instant they can shatter.. don't put all of your troubles, your pleasures and your battles on someone else.. don't make someone else your everything when they don't want to be... I feel as if I am trying to fix the unfix-able, like I am trying to mold hard cement.. I'm believing in the impossible...
but why..
why am I placed in this situation? To teach or to learn.. In life we are placed in situations that we are often forced to question, to wonder why..why am I someones everything?